The mind can wander--sometimes for its user's benefit, sometimes to his detriment. A simple and obvious example is this very passage: I wanted to write weeks ago about a wide-ranging conversation our family meandered through, but kept allowing for the other distractions of life that kept me from sharing that very subject. I delay no longer (for fear of both losing my way back to the subject and of leaving this space untended too long).
Sometimes I think the best dialogues we get into are those that have no discernible beginning, middle, and end. Life does not usually follow a classic story model anyway. Our best friends, our closest family, and our significant others can engage us in talks that rely on the nature of the Imperfect Compass--fitting no outline, no set path, but still taking you somewhere you want to go together.
Often these discourses have certain "nodes" that you can go back to or touch upon to redirect the flow, whether it's within minutes ("what were we talking about again") or some other time altogether ("remember when"). The more you travel downstream, the more you need those dots on the map behind ("how did we get here--oh, yeah, we started there").
My favorite versions of these conversations have usually involved sharing something with my son, sometimes with my wife along for the ride, sometimes not, but valuable and fun either way. The boy is still in that critical window I have heard described by others as being between the time the child can understand you and the time the child can't stand you: the listening and learning years. That makes him an empty vessel for pouring in as much as he can handle, and I like to allow for some redirection from his questions...and that means we could be floating down a stream of consciousness belonging to either one of us.
The talk that we enjoyed recently jumped off from Ecuador...sure, why not? How did that even happen? Sunday morning breakfast noshing, up pops a TV promo for a US Soccer friendly against--yes--Ecuador. Next thing you know, I chime in about where Ecuador is and make the translation connection to the equator. From there it was soon a short jaunt to the Galapagos Islands off the coast, and that naturally meant welcoming the HMS Beagle and Charles Darwin, along with his observations, how they came about, and what they would mean when all that proverbially hit the fan in the scientific and religious communities back home...which meant a brief trip through the Book of Genesis as well. We dabbled in how the two sides separated by Darwin's publication have essentially remained at loggerheads to this day. That said, I try not to draw too many conclusions for my son, but I do like to set up enough support to help him figure some things out on his own...or at least give him the freedom to do so.
Other stops along the voyage that morning (and there were MANY) included Columbus and the New World, Galileo observing the stars, some sights at familiar zoos, and--you do remember this started with a soccer game promo, right? Geography, science, and religion because of ESPN...okey-doke, I'm game.
It reminded me of a similar talk from months before that touched on a wide array of topics from history and geopolitics. How did I get into that tangle with the boy? Because I wanted to be sure he had enough background to understand "Captain America", of course. Next thing I know, we have gone over WWII and the Cold War in far greater depth than I ever intended, and hit other historical nodes on the way--based largely on jumping-off-points generated as tidbits picked up from our trip to Washington, D.C. last year.
Before I give you the wrong impression, we certainly don't do this stuff all the time. These wanderings are more exception than rule. Far more typical: he's trying to convince me that there's a difference between this Beyblade and that Beyblade (my basic take--they are still just fancy metal tops, and despite whatever tiny modifications they may have, THEY...ARE...ALL...THE...SAME), and I'm trying to make it clear why checking down to a receiver only two yards downfield on third and long is a bad idea...oh, who am I kidding, he's nine and he understands that...but I'll never get the thing with the tops.
I guess I'm wandering here, and that is fitting given the topic at hand. But if there's a lesson or message, it's to let the focus drift on occasion. If you're in a business meeting or making a presentation, stay on message, by all means. If you're in a conversation with those you would share anything and everything with, well, let the stream take you to any shore. It's a fun ride.
My Choice Song for the Post: "Lost in My Mind" - The Head and the Heart
("Momma once told me/You’re already home where you feel love/I am lost in my mind/I get lost in my mind"...a recent release that deserved a little more attention than I think it got--not as deep as it may want to be, perhaps, but cozy and comfortable, and that suits me just fine)
My iPod's Choice via Shuffle: "Dreaming My Dreams" - The Cranberries
(not cozy fun like the song above, but a slow, brooding number from this once-familiar Irish group...worth noting it does include the somewhat appropriate opening lyrics "All the things you said to me today/Changed my perspective in every way")
